When you fell off your bike and broke your arm as a child, the doctor put it in a cast to give it the best chance to heal. It wasn’t always easy, but after a month or two, all was well. Living through the emotional turmoil of divorce is not as easy to fix as a broken bone. There is no cast for the heart and the healing process is likely to take much longer. However, there are suggested methods to give yourself the best chance at a faster and happier recovery after divorce.
In an article for the relationship website Your Tango, divorce recovery coach Leila Reyes shares three techniques for bringing happiness back into your life. Here is what she recommends:
- Smile: Most people are familiar with the song “Smile”. The lyrics emphasize the importance of continuing to smile even though a heart is broken. Psychologists have found some truth in this advice. When we change our physical body, it can improve our mood. So, don’t just smile…get outside and stretch or take a walk. Go to the gym and work out. Don’t think about it too much, just smile and do it.
- Choose Joy: Reyes says, “You might not see a happy life beyond your current situation, but you can take charge of your experience by choosing how you will respond to what’s happening.” Start by imagining things that give you joy. Then make a list of the things you haven’t had an opportunity to do in a while. Once a week, do one of those things, whether you want to or not. The discipline of enjoying activities will get easier as your heart heals. It’s a win-win.
- Best Foot Forward: Choose to begin the process with gratitude for a time to reinvent the future. “You have a new life to create for yourself,” says Reyes. Part of that transition includes making a commitment to act with grace and kindness. If you walk around angry, you will be perceived in a more negative light then if you go in expectation of the next good thing. In order to facilitate this change, try journaling. Get a beautiful book that you love to spend time with, and write down all the feelings you are ready to expel and those you want to embrace. Write down things you are thankful for every day and give yourself the best chance to heal.
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None of this is easy, but practicing the discipline of any one of these ideas is like going to physical therapy for your broken arm. It hurts, but you know it is valuable. Soon, you will realize that with practice and repetition, these actions are becoming easier, you are getting stronger, and you are having more good days than bad.
Board Certified Marital and Family Law Attorney Charles D. Jamieson understands that divorce is an extremely sensitive and important issue. Thanks to extensive experience and a focus on open communication, Attorney Jamieson adeptly addresses the complex issues surrounding divorce while delivering excellent personal service. To discuss divorce in Florida, please contact The Law Firm of Charles D. Jamieson, P.A.The Law Firm of Charles D. Jamieson, P.A. or call 561-478-0312.
